Sure-Fire Ways to Get Excommunicated
Learn to recite the Lord's Prayer backwards.
Refuse to accept the Eucharist -- bread transfigured into Jesus' actual
body -- because you're vegetarian.
Dress up your daughter as Lilith for Halloween.
Give up going to church for Lent.
Ask your priest questions like, "What happens to a baby that dies in
a car accident on the way to its baptism? Does it spend eternity in
limbo/hell with all the other unbaptized babies?"
Refuse to practice the Rhythm Method on the grounds that it's morally
Laugh during mass or confession.
Have WWJD tattooed on your genitals.
Save time and effort: excommunicate yourself
the number one way to get yourself excommunicated
Read the bible, religiously.